Just keep me where the light is.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

(Source: oldresidentdistrict, via companioncubette)

sweetanimebabes:

thepagejakeenglish:

CANT RISK IT


I am LUIGI. I’ve already been cursed. Don’t tease me.

sweetanimebabes:

thepagejakeenglish:

CANT RISK IT

I am LUIGI. I’ve already been cursed. Don’t tease me.

(via not-100percent-a-dick)

jencorpsichord:

young adult things: washing your colors with your whites because you don’t care you JUST don’t fucking care

(Source: brideofgodzilla, via not-100percent-a-dick)

h0llo:

ive stolen this line and used it so many times

h0llo:

ive stolen this line and used it so many times

(Source: ed-ingle, via missatwiggs)

fiftythreecrimes:

cubebreaker:

Thanks to the recent addition of their own 21x41ft pool, dogs at Lucky Puppy in Maybee, Michigan got to have their very own doggy pool party.

when I die this better be what heaven looks like tbh

(via slappinbitches)